“We have here only five loaves of bread and two fish,” they answered. ~Matthew 14:17
Do you remember this story, maybe from Sunday School? The disciples were freaking out, because Jesus told them to feed 5,000 people with nothing but a couple fish and a few measly loaves of bread.
I freak out, too, when I feel life calls me to be and do way more than I’m capable of:
- School’s starting soon. How will I ever get myself and my kids organized in time?
- I don’t tithe enough. But the bills are overwhelming. Will I ever obey God fully in this area of my life?
- I thought I was done with healing from abuse. Will that certain sore spot ever go away?
- I yelled too much at my child last week. Why can’t I parent with ease and grace like so-and-so?
- My house is so much smaller than theirs. Will we ever get ahead? And what’s wrong with me, that I can’t keep from comparing myself to others?
My basket of smelly fish and stale bread is so insufficient . . . leaves me starving for more . . . makes me feel like a fish-out-of-water in a dry, barren world. (Sorta like this bluegill my kids caught last night.)
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Cor 12:9)
But Lord, I reply, nothing feels sufficient. I fight every day to catch my breath in the midst of madness. My spiritual gills can’t siphon what they need from everything swirling around me.
“Those who cling to worthless idols forfeit the grace that could be theirs.” Jonah 2:8
But Lord, what am I clinging to? (Isn’t it obvious?!?) Help me not to cling to anything but You.
“Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.” (2 Cor. 4:15-16)
Renew me, Lord. Breath life into the stale parts of my soul. Help me put behind the things of this world that ensnare and choke me with worry and fatigue, so that I may give You what little I have to take and divide and bring You glory.
How great is God—beyond our understanding!
The number of his years is past finding out.
He draws up the drops of water,
which distill as rain to the streams;
the clouds pour down their moisture
and abundant showers fall on mankind. (Job 36:26-28)
Lord, please send Your showers of grace to fall upon those feeling inadequate, incapable, and woozy from life today.
Replace our myopic view of our pitiful ponds with a heart which extends way past ourselves for You and Your Kingdom.
Make the ripples of Your Holy Spirit flow through the pain and smooth the choppy places into peace as still as glass.
“And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.” (2 Cor. 9:8)